Tim didn’t “rob the cradle” – I robbed the rocking chair.
It’s true – Tim, the first person I ever asked out, totally turned me down.
There was something about him that intrigued me, with his kind eyes and calming presence…
I had worked up “liquid courage” by drinking a few cocktails at the gym we worked at’s Christmas party, and, after a casual conversation with him and a fellow trainer about if they ever wanted kids, I proceeded to text him a joke about having 8 babies with him.
I wanted to feel out if he had any interest in dating me, but I was too insecure to simply say, “Hey, I’d like to go on a date with you,” even after being coworkers for many months.
He texted back, “Haha,” with no other response, so the next day I gathered courage to prod a little more and hint that I was interested in dating him. He said no, because at 25 years old to his 40, I was “too young,” and that he “loved me like a sister.”
But for some reason, I did not take no for an answer. I prodded further, saying that age is just a number and that my parents are the same age difference.
I found out that his impression of me from a mutual friend was that I was a partier, so I had to explain that, yes, when I hang out with my friends from high school, I can play a mean game of Flip Cup, but there there’s much more to me than that.
And I got mad about the whole “loving me like a sister part” – I mean, he had only known me for a few months. “How could you love me like a sister?” I asked him, annoyed.
After only knowing him for a few months, I certainly didn’t love him as much as as I love my brothers, who have been some of my best friends for my entire life.
Somehow during a couple days of email exchanges, he saw enough of my serious, fired-up side to see me as more than just an average 25 year-old, and decided I had enough substance below the surface to agree to go on a date with me. We had a blast and the rest is history.
So this Valentine’s Day and everyday, remember to look rejection in the eye, and never take no for an answer if your heart tells you not to.
Oh, and Tim Sinnett, thanks for finally giving me a chance.
I forgot to charge my watch before today’s workout. In the past, I would’ve beaten myself up a bit for doing “dumb” things like that, the little voice in my head telling I don’t have my act together enough to be an Olympian or a world champion…
Today I chose another thought. 👍 I chose to take it as a sign to run not by pace or heart rate but by feel. So instead of trying to catch glances at my watch while my arms pumped quickly, and then doing pace and heart rate calculations in my mind throughout the workout to get it all “just right” – I cleared my mind, ran as hard as I felt like, enjoyed the cold wind on my face, soaked in the mountain view, and smiled through intense breaths at my fellow runners as they passed by. 😊
It reminded me of how, as a kid, running made me feel free – free from chores and a strict childhood, free to be me, wild hair flapping in the wind. 🏃♀️
As my workouts start to get more intense and I get ready to race in two weeks, I’m making myself a promise: this year, no matter how hard I’m working and how big my goals are, I vow to keep that child-like spirit alive, the spirit of sprinting out of the classroom at the sound of the recess bell, eyes twinkling, face smiling, ready to go play with my friends. ❤️
As I sit here to reflect on 2018 with a gash on my forehead from running into a tree branch last week, I wish I could say that was the dumbest thing I did all year…
But 2018 for me was full of mistakes, most of which I’m not exactly proud of, like how trying to squeeze in one last hard training session before leaving for American Ninja without warming up led me to get a calf strain and not only fall within a few seconds of competing on the show, but also be so caught up in healing my calf strain that week that I put off changing my oil when the light came on, only to have my car die on the way home from ANW competition, costing me thousands of dollars to replace our only car.
Not my brightest moment.
But amidst many more silly mistakes, there is a mistake I’m proud of: I moved from my hometown of Seattle to Colorado to fully pursue my athletic career, thinking that was the best place to train and get back into fighting shape within a year of having a baby.
It was a risk, it was tough to do with a newborn, and I ended up being wrong.
But in battling post-partum depression in a new town, I realized how important my hometown friends are to me, and, without my siblings around to check in on their little sis, I learned catch myself when anxious thoughts like, “What if my husband, Tim’s cancer comes back?” flooded my mind and change my mindset. I learned to “self-soothe” by prioritizing self-care, taking pressure off myself, and learning to “live in the moment” each time my baby smiles, giggles, or gives a hug, reminding myself that my family (an countless families around the world) have survived MUCH worse, and that life, in general, is grand, even when it feels relatively difficult.
That humbling experience now allows me to be there for others battling similar feelings, and for that I’m grateful. In fact, I’m launching a new business focused on helping women feel fit, energetic, and confident after giving birth!
My 2018 mistakes caused me to grow. And if my mistakes can help others, then they were totally worth it. ❤️
Do your goals motivate you? Do you aim high enough?
When I was pregnant, I set lofty goals for my first season back. And I didn’t hit a single one of them all year.
Not. A. Single. One.
First new mom up the American Ninja Warrior warped wall? Fell on the first obstacle, so yeah, not even close. Win the OCRWC 3k World Championship? How about 11 spots back (a finish place I’m still grateful for, but not exactly my goal).
But ya know what? As far-fetched as they may have been, I needed those goals to keep me motivated through my wonderful yet exhausting new life with a newborn. I may not have hit those goals in real life, but I got to visualize myself doing it a hundred times in my head, feeling the positive energy people dish out freely to those who win.
It’s not that I need to win to feed my ego; it’s just that as the youngest girl in a big family, I learned that performing well as an athlete was the most effective way for me to earn respect and feel special, and I’ve been training ‘n’ racing hard ever since.
So between holiday parties and enjoying time with family, as you start to think about your goals for next year, I encourage you to go big and aim high. Because whether you achieve them or not, you’re always better off if you go for it!
Looking for ways to feel less anxious and more confident on the starting line? We all are!
Most people tend to feel nervous before a race, (even if they know they prepared themselves well for what lies ahead), and while a few “butterflies” can serve us well, too much anxiety can take the fun out of the overall race experience. Before a race, adrenaline kicks in, leading to an elevated heart rate and an elevated respiration level. For most of us, this is accompanied by a sense of squeamishness in our stomachs.
While most people dread these feelings and tolerate them as a necessary part of racing, author and running coach Matt Fitzgerald recommends we choose to interpret the “butterflies in stomach” feeling as excitement rather than anxiety, since our brain doesn’t know the difference. Certified hypnotherapist Tim Sinnett explains, “One strategy is to try to reduce that intensity of the nervous feeling, but another strategy is to cognitively reframe the feeling from that of nervousness to excitement. The visceral feeling is natural – it’s our interpretation of it that causes anxiety.”
Check out this three-step process for feeling like a superhero on the start line…
1) Cognitively reframe feelings of nervousness to that of excitement (as described above)
2) Do a power pose
-According to social psychologist Amy Cuddy, “Body language affects how others see us, but it may also affect how we see ourselves.” I think this theory has merit, because in my experience, standing tall on the start line in a “Wonder Woman pose” with my arms on hips, chest open, shoulders relaxed, helps me feel confident, empowered, and ready to roll.
3) Wear something that makes you feel confident
-When I do road races, I like to dress up in a superhero costume (e.g. Batgirl or Wonder Woman) because it keeps me relaxed and having fun yet also makes me actually feel like a superhero! According to a study by Danish researchers, this is due to a theory called “enclothed cognition,” which essentially means people dressed a certain way act similarly to the way they are dressed, described in more detail here: https://humanoctane.com/blog/post/enclothed-cognition-html When competing on American Ninja Warrior, I like to wear red, white, and blue, covered in stars; and during wet, muddy obstacle course races, I like to wear sleek, high-quality compression gear. From high school cross country runners wearing their hair in French braids to Olympic track star Alysia Montana wearing a yellow flower in her hair, showing up in your version of makes you look good will help you feel good and feel confident.
Why is confidence so important when it comes to racing? Confidence plays an important role in getting us to perform our best. It takes confidence to go out in a faster heat and work to stay up with a fast pack, and it takes confidence to jump on the monkey bars (without stopping to take a breather) and take a risk tackling them with a high heart rate.
So next time you race, take the time to dress in a way that makes you feel your best, stand on the start line with good posture, and greet feelings of nervousness as a sign that you’re excited and ready to rock your race! Try it and let me know how it works for you!
Tim didn’t “rob the cradle” – I robbed the rocking chair.
It’s true – Tim, the first person I ever asked out, totally turned me down.
There was something about him that intrigued me, with his kind eyes and calming presence…
I had worked up “liquid courage” by drinking a few cocktails at the gym we worked at’s Christmas party, and, after a casual conversation with him and a fellow trainer about if they ever wanted kids, I proceeded to text him a joke about having 8 babies with him.
I wanted to feel out if he had any interest in dating me, but I was too insecure to simply say, “Hey, I’d like to go on a date with you,” even after being coworkers for many months.
He texted back, “Haha,” with no other response, so the next day I gathered courage to prod a little more and hint that I was interested in dating him. He said no, because at 25 years old to his 40, I was “too young,” and that he “loved me like a sister.”
But for some reason, I did not take no for an answer. I prodded further, saying that age is just a number and that my parents are the same age difference.
I found out that his impression of me from a mutual friend was that I was a partier, so I had to explain that, yes, when I hang out with my friends from high school, I can play a mean game of Flip Cup, but there there’s much more to me than that.
And I got mad about the whole “loving me like a sister part” – I mean, he had only known me for a few months. “How could you love me like a sister?” I asked him, annoyed.
After only knowing him for a few months, I certainly didn’t love him as much as as I love my brothers, who have been some of my best friends for my entire life.
Somehow during a couple days of email exchanges, he saw enough of my serious, fired-up side to see me as more than just an average 25 year-old, and decided I had enough substance below the surface to agree to go on a date with me. We had a blast and the rest is history.
So this Valentine’s Day and everyday, remember to look rejection in the eye, and never take no for an answer if your heart tells you not to.
Oh, and Tim Sinnett, thanks for finally giving me a chance.
As I sit here to reflect on 2018 with a gash on my forehead from running into a tree branch last week, I wish I could say that was the dumbest thing I did all year…
But 2018 for me was full of mistakes, most of which I’m not exactly proud of, like how trying to squeeze in one last hard training session before leaving for American Ninja without warming up led me to get a calf strain and not only fall within a few seconds of competing on the show, but also be so caught up in healing my calf strain that week that I put off changing my oil when the light came on, only to have my car die on the way home from ANW competition, costing me thousands of dollars to replace our only car.
Not my brightest moment.
But amidst many more silly mistakes, there is a mistake I’m proud of: I moved from my hometown of Seattle to Colorado to fully pursue my athletic career, thinking that was the best place to train and get back into fighting shape within a year of having a baby.
It was a risk, it was tough to do with a newborn, and I ended up being wrong.
But in battling post-partum depression in a new town, I realized how important my hometown friends are to me, and, without my siblings around to check in on their little sis, I learned catch myself when anxious thoughts like, “What if my husband, Tim’s cancer comes back?” flooded my mind and change my mindset. I learned to “self-soothe” by prioritizing self-care, taking pressure off myself, and learning to “live in the moment” each time my baby smiles, giggles, or gives a hug, reminding myself that my family (an countless families around the world) have survived MUCH worse, and that life, in general, is grand, even when it feels relatively difficult.
That humbling experience now allows me to be there for others battling similar feelings, and for that I’m grateful. In fact, I’m launching a new business focused on helping women feel fit, energetic, and confident after giving birth!
My 2018 mistakes caused me to grow. And if my mistakes can help others, then they were totally worth it. ❤️
Looking for ways to feel less anxious and more confident on the starting line? We all are!